Power of Empathy
Have you ever looked at someone doing a task and thought you can do it better?
How do you respond?
Does the other person feel empowered after your input?
The chances are that there are at least two regular occasions you find yourself critically reviewing another persons approach:
1) when you've done the task many times before and are incredibly capable and competent (and you're watching somebody who is new/less experienced) and
2) When you don't have any real life experience doing the task and you look from the outside looking in thinking it is easier than it is.
Both mindsets need a healthy dose of empathy and self awareness. Without these it is inevitable that you will come across as arrogant, condescending, disrespectful or some other emotively charged way that creates tension and division. Leaders with Emotional Quotient/Intelligence (EQ) understand the power of meeting people where they are at. When we are prepared to “put ourselves in their shoes” we give the gift of both respect and safety. This does not mean we need to drop standards. To the contrary, it is the holding of standards that highlights any gaps between knowledge, skills and capabilities and required performance.
The 1990’s saw “EQ” come to the fore in both management and popular psychology. The momentum has grown due to the profound difference in responses from people when compared to the traditional autocratic management style. Sometimes this is couched in phrases like, “Do you manage from your head or your heart?”, “Are you a heart or head leader?”, “Do you have a culture of being heart lead?”. What would your answers to those questions be?
Empathy is different from sympathy. Empathy, done well, gives people dignity and treats people with respect. It is being willing to understand where someone is at, where they have come from and why they might be behaving the way they are, without condoning behaviour. Empathy allows expression without the weight of judging another. It can be seen in the willingness to work with people, coach them and manage them to get them to where you want them to be. Leaders and managers with EQ are able to see the potential in somebody and draw this forth, very often seeing potential in people and their past experiences, that they're unaware of themselves.
Charisma can often be one of the hallmark qualities of impacting leaders. The challenge this often presents is that a business is run on the fragile strength of personality. When leading with empathy there is a greater inclination to focus on the culture of an organisation. Combined with clear mission, values and vision, people find a place where they can thrive. Are your team fully engaged and thriving? Might you need to consider your approach and communication style with your team to help them feel seen and heard? There is great power in empathy.
